A Quick Opinion Poll

Let me just warn everyone now... I am a bonafide asshole.
With that said, on with the story.
Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand

I happen to be a Fag Hag and I love it. I've found that more gay men have their shit together and know how to treat a woman than straight men do and the best part about it? They don't expect you to whip out the kneepads at the end of the night. Also, gay men give the best, most honest compliments. If I look good, it's all about the "Work! Girl!!" If I look like shit I will get read the riot act - minus the finger snapping...

Moving right along
Last week while hanging out with my hopelessly fine crew of rather stylish gentleman I met someone. Now I know what you're saying "Mala, ain't you got one hot piece of man meat waiting in the wings to make funny faces with you in the dark?" The answer is yes, but let's be pragmatic: just because you are on a diet doesn't mean you can't look at the menu - fuck around you can even grab an appetizer or two. {you know I love you baby} So back to the guy:

We're all in Stonewall and I'm doing the whole 'dance-in-the-mirror' thing that I'm well known for while, Cliff (our straight boy) is throwing back vodka and shaking his head in confusion, Jason is hitting on the bartender, Walt is swaying to the beat and I kind of forget where the hell Cedric was. Over comes this SWOLE dude. I mean it. He had more muscle than a Quahog clam. Dude is slicked up and oiled down, has his shirt off and get this: Is sporting 2 nipple rings. I immediately deduce that he is one of the go-go dancers at the club... did I mention we were at Stonewall? That club is gayer than Liberace's lipstick.

After some dancing - hey, I'll dance with just about anybody... I love dancing - he makes the request to take me out. After, of course, swearing up one side of Mount Everest and down the other that he is straight.... Direct quote? "It's just a gig."

I don't know about you, but my eyebrow is still somewhere up around my uneven hairline. Suuuuuuuuuure it is dude.

But instead of being a complete asshole, I'll let y'all be the judge and depending on how it turns out (which sort of amounts to whether y'all have the evil sense of humor that I do) I'll either go out with dude (then write about it of course) or pretend it never happened.

Now, it's bad enough some of y'all didn't get your ass up that November morn so we ended up with a piece of Bush dumber than Jessica Simpson. Don't disappoint me. You're sitting in front of your keyboard, click your mouse navigate to the
The Nipple Man Dilemma
page and vote dammit...

Ok, I gotta go get dressed to meet Juste before her performance @ Crash Mansion tonight
I'll check back in with y'all later...

- & I'm out, happy that my baby would never go-go...